!DOCTYPE html PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD XHTML 1.0 Transitional//EN" "http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/DTD/xhtml1-transitional.dtd"> Jen's Dirty Thirties

oh deer!

2006-05-11 / 4:11 p.m.
boy do i have some things to tell all of you!

first of all, morgan spurlock made his 30 days thing look too easy. sure, i've been "doing my thing" more than i have in let's say...4 YEARS. sad, sad--i know, but (insert whiny voice here) i just don't have the time to masturbate every single day. isn't that pathetic? i've managed to do something 5 out of the 11 days of may. how do boys find the time to do it? is it their "quick draw mcgraw sensibilities? i will say the times i've squeezed a pleasure session in for myself has been totally worth it. i'm much more relaxed. a couple of times have been during my lunch break at work-(i know, i know--a job "no-no"), and for the record, something i've never done before. the relief is better than smoking a cigarette. job stress? go rub one out in the john and even the biggest most annoying department asshole won't matter. the whole thing has inspired me to start taking a small vibrator to work, concealing it in my gym bag of course.

the unspoken pact that i had made with deer has ended. yesterday morning, i hit one while on my way home from work. i should really say that it hit ME. i felt awful. i looked in my rear view mirror and saw it lying there in the road. realistically, hitting any sort of woodland critter is an inevitability because i live near a state forest. fortunately, the damage to the car was minimal, and the pontiac is still driveable. i still have this gnawing in the pit of my stomach though, like i've done something really bad.

i finished reading "a prayer for owen meany" quite some time ago. i was so moved by the book i would talk about it to others. someone at work said, "sounds like that movie 'simon burch'", and i thought, no way--because my nerdly assed husband would have told me if a movie had materialized out of the book. there was a copy of the movie at work, so i watched it a few rotations ago. it was a total piece of shit. i talked to vinnie about it, and he said that yes, someone tried to make a movie about the book, but ol' john irving wouldn't have any part of it. in the credits, it says "suggested by the book 'a prayer for owen meany'" but it really should have said, "bastardized the hell out of the book 'a prayer for owen meany'". i'll get off my soap box about it. if any of you have had to see that movie, please-please for the love of god, don't think that is how the book is. the book is so much more.

i'm currently reading "the stand" by stephen king, and my biggest regret is seeing the movie before reading the book. i'm almost done and it's been a nice ride. i think i will read "the world according to garp" next.

speaking of rides, do i have time to 'double click my mouse' before work? no.

there's always my lunch break....

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