Jen's Dirty Thirties
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and in the end there is judgement
2005-06-01 / 10:07 a.m.
yeah, yeah, and yeah: so i haven't been that great in keeping regular entries. i have my reasons faithful readers-(all 5 of you!)the end of the world is near. i am NOT fucking with you. pack your shit and prepare to evacuate. i must warn you in advance that if you are a heathen and destined to slow roast in hades, according to popular christian music, they "don't serve breakfast in hell". so, make sure to eat a hearty meal before kissing your ass goodbye.
if you are one of pious st. peter's precious posse, and you're gonna play the harps in the clouds n' shit, according to a marquis board at an assembly of god church "you cannot bring a U-HAUL to heaven". apparently god abhors packrats.
so you wanna know why i think the end is near? you should like me to stop teasing you and just give you the fucking answer? okay, okay...here it goes:
METALLICA WAS ON THE JANE PAULEY SHOW A COUPLE DAYS AGO. THIS IS ONE OF THE SIGNS OF THE APOCALYPSE. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.
HAVE A NICE DAY.